Being a Dad to 3 Kids
What have you heard about having a third child?
You are going from offense to defense.
You don't have enough arms and hands to wrestle them all.
You're outnumber now!
We heard just about all of these and frankly they are all probably true. But let me give you my thoughts has Hayden has only been with us for 19 days now....
Having a baby in the house is fun. There is something comforting about holding a baby. Like when they nestle up to you and fall asleep... umm... nothing better.
But what about the other two? Ya know, the two children that now are able to terrorize, destroy and dismember the house when mom is taking care of the baby. They enjoy the baby well enough and think he is "cute" and will sometimes even want to hold him. But they are now faced with the challenge of mom not giving them her full attention. Mom has a baby permanently attached to her most of the day. This means the other 2 either react by feeling neglected and need extra attention from someone else or relish in the freedom and are extra destructive. Maybe they have a combination of both. Mom is at the forefront of this battle between the kids.
But don't forget about the other responsibilities mom has when she stays home. Cooking, cleaning, taking kids to soccer and school, church responsibilities and a world of other things. So what does that mean for me? The dad?
For me as a dad I've noticed that when I get home at the end of the day that all the responsibilities, cares, worries and burdens that were on me at work disappear when I get home. I don't mean that they go away and I won't have to deal with them. What I mean is when I step across the front door of my home that I need to BE HOME. My mind, heart and spirit can't be any where else.
Practically speaking this means I give my wife a break when she needs one! I don't ask if she needs one. I perceive it by opening my eyes to her world. Then I help in whatever way I can. I also give my attention to my kids. This means off my phone, no college or NFL football on, but giving to my kids what they really want: a Dad who wants to play and who shows love to them. A few minutes of wrestling with Dad goes a long way.
This picture is of my son wanting to play with Dad. He gets tired of me taking pictures of him and hiding behind the camera and wants me to come out and play!
I've recently come to the realizing that any guy, dude or bro can be a dad. That's not what your wife. kids and frankly the rest of society need. They need me and us to be a GOOD dad. That takes effort. That takes sacrifice. That takes humility.
Saying that means I have a lot of things to work on. I know what I need to be and now being that is going to take a lifetime of work. But as long as I keep trying and let my kids remind me of the Dad I need to be, hopefully I'll get better each day.
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